Karma, Karma, Karma Coming to Getcha

For those of you all who don’t know, I work in customer service. Which is highly ironic because I HATE people/humanity on a bone deep level. But in my case, I am more in charge of investigating reported issues for validity, before providing a resolution, which I do in fact, love.

It is a very interesting job and for being so low-key it is a great position to get recognition on a company level when the job is done right. However, in my department, I have one other coworker, and he happens to be a soup sandwich.

Soup Sandwich

noun

1. A term used in the US Army to denote extreme uselessness.

It is directed toward something or someone that is the figurative equivalent of the literal hot sloppy pile of shit that a gob of soup between two pieces of sandwich bread would be.

Like most other retailers, our company closed the stores and furloughed workers as the states shut down cities and set up remain in place orders for non-essential businesses. Clearly, not all retail is essential, so our store closed down.

However, our company has an online component that has done brisk business, but when the stores closed down, customers went ape shit and broke the online systems placing hundreds of thousands of orders practically overnight. What the actual fuck is wrong with people? I guess more people practice retail therapy than I realized? Apparently not everyone was without income, or maybe it was all those stimulus checks…

In any case, our online business was overwhelmed by the influx of orders and the system broke. Orders were delayed by weeks, and in some cases months. Shit happens.

However, the company had a brilliant idea to curtail the loss of income, and that was to reopen for delivery orders only so customers could order from the store stock instead of from the backlogged online warehouses. It was a good plan which involved bringing back employees in leadership positions and especially based on seniority/tenure in their positions.

When you are a soup sandwich, it doesn’t matter how long you have been with the company, you don’t get picked for the all star team when it is clear that there is a better team mate, and this case that person was me.

So I got to go back to work almost immediately, I was barely out of work before I was going back. It was all good. They knew they had made the logical choice. So back to the soup sandwich…

He is petty and basic.

So almost a month into the routine he is brought back to work, and he is barely there. He leaves early, he doesn’t manage to get the actual work done coming up with all sorts of excuses about being needed elsewhere, when somehow, with the same manning on my team, I manage to get my shit done as well as help out other departments when needed.

Time passes and the country begins reopening businesses. So of course, our company is going to follow suit and reopen to customers, with some social distancing rules in place to keep the coworkers safer from customers who are just going to do whatever, especially in a state like Texas. However, they make this decision practically overnight with almost no warning and without concessions to the lack of manpower since not everyone has returned to work just yet.

So when I say it was all hands on deck, that is literally the case. Despite knowing we are short handed, this asshole tells me he is going to purposefully visit some random friend who has been diagnosed with COVID-19 and then have to quarantine himself for 2 weeks. What the actual fuck?

So he disappears for a week and unfortunately fails to turn off his location in Snapchat and another team mate spots him at a local adult arcade/fun bar down the street. Clearly not quarantining himself. Not to mention that his roommate has come into work for their scheduled shifts this past week, so apparently the quarantine is a hoax.

I am conflicted with how much of a deal I want to make this and if I should confront the asshole whenever he decides to come back to work, if ever. But at the same time, is it worth my effort? I don’t know.

I really want to call him out on it because he has fucked with everyone’s schedule on our team, especially mine.

At the same time, it is my experience that this tactic only works on those who give a shit about their reputation, and who have integrity.

integrity

noun

1. the quality of being honest and having strong moral principles; moral uprightness.

Sadly, he has none. He’s a two faced little bitch who deserves a comeuppance.

Everyone has noticed that he hasn’t come to work. Especially when I am scheduled off work, and there is no one else from my department there to handle issues… I hope he knows that he is going to have to answer a lot of questions if and when he comes back. There aren’t enough excuses in the world to cover his ass this time.