No Shit Sherlock Awards

Today’s award goes to the Office Max Print Center employee. His efforts to point out the obvious as his work center computer ceased to respond and that he would have to restart went above and beyond the call of duty.

There is nothing I hate more than people pointing out to me what I have already pointed out.

As I sat there and watched the Windows 7 eternity circle go round and round as the computer attempted to detect my USB drive, it was clear to me that the OS was hung up in some cycle caused most likely by said employee minimizing some task (that was eating up all the available RAM) most likely in his haste to handle the sudden influx of customers right at the pre-lunch hour.

Worse was his repetitive clicking of the mouse as if that was going to make the eternity circle go faster and the computer purge through whatever tasks sat in its queue. He needn’t have explained to me that the computer crashed often, given his ham-fisted attempts, any operating system would crash and burn during his shift.

It eventually took the intervention of a female coworker to convince this Sherlock Award recipient that he needed to restart the computer so he could then print my files… During which he then felt necessary to fill the silence with some mumbo jumbo about the corporate office supposedly contracting Microsoft to create a “pared down” version of Windows 7 just for OfficeMax and that it didn’t run like other versions of Windows 7.

Seriously? WTF… dude, I saw the little Windows 7 Enterprise logo come on the screen during the reboot, do you even know what the fuck you’re talking about? Or does it make you feel like a big man spouting idiotic mumbo jumbo to the little woman at the counter? OMG…

There’s an hour of my life I’ll never see again.