Trick Me Once

Is it gullibility that keeps me in this perpetual loop with the idiots of the world running me ragged? I spent the entirety of the day resting from the sheer exhaustion that caught up with me from the events of last week.

It was a nonstop whirlwind of tending to the needs of everyone else but me. I didn’t have time to tend to my needs because I was busy playing host, cook and chauffeur. At the end of the week, I was sick of myself after I saw the score I got on my last test.

I had a huge argument with my brother on this exact subject about two months ago, that I have realized my big weakness is helping people, and that I do so at cost to myself.

This past week clearly illustrated that for my brother, and he didn’t have much to say other than to make it clear that he wanted no part in helping me in my predicament. I asked for his help two times and one would have thought it was a HUGE inconvenience for him.

Despite his unwillingness to help me, he didn’t feel too put upon to show up uninvited three days in a row for dinner, then remaining until midnight or later talking me to death on whatever random subject struck his fancy.

I suppose he forgot that I had stuff to do, and forgot my earlier complaints about how pressed for time I was going to be thanks to me volunteering to host someone in my apartment for a week… typical.

I don’t even want to see my electricity bill after that last week. Who in the hell falls asleep with every lamp on in a bedroom when they are staying in someone else’s home? When I asked if I could assist by turning the lights off for them, I was told that “they were fine” as they were… wow.

I get myself in these situations and then I have to suffer until it is over. I don’t know how else to extricate myself in a way that doesn’t result in screaming or huge fights where bad and hurtful words are exchanged and bridges get burned.

In this case, I am distancing myself and at least I set a limit to one week versus two. I can’t deal with people who are completely oblivious to the state of the people around them! Why am I plagued with these sorts of people?

It’s an odd predicament because it’s always the ones closest to me that pose a danger. I am not usually fooled by complete strangers. I don’t get drawn in by sales people. It’s the people that I would think I could trust that I can’t trust.

I am left bitter and more wary with each encounter. I am glad this most recent trial is over, I could not have endured any more. Trick me once, sure. Not gonna happen twice.